show you my dark side, will you still hold me tonight? And if I open my heart to you, show you my weak side, what would you do?
-The Final Cut
So it seems that keeping a blog is an odd proposition for someone who is, at times, insanely private and not driven to sharing. I often think of things that I find interesting, or odd, or frightening that I would like to explore through writing and having conversations. But when I sit down to begin I almost immediately am overwhelmed with the feeling that keeping my mouth shut and my fingers silent is most likely the better course of action. It also seems as though on those rare occasions that I am ready to open up a bit on a subject something far more important and immediate pops up to take over whatever time I would have used to write.
It's funny, I often catch myself assuming that the people in my life know and understand the way I feel about them until I realize that unless they have started to read minds, they wouldn't have any reason to know. (As a side note, if any of you have learned how to read minds...enter at your risk, no one here gets out alive.) I think that I am going to use a series of posts to attempt to, in some small way, remedy this.
A month or two back I posted a my Facebook status update: "I have the best sisters. Ever. Just thought you should know." And it is true. Most people are lucky if they have the influence of one awesome sister and I have four. Rebecca, Joanne, Laura, and Sarah. Four beautiful, intelligent, and loving women each strong in their own way. Neither my family or I would be in the place we are at today if it wasn't for the help of my sisters. And I truly would be remiss if I didn't add Andrea Rediske to this list. It's not for nothing that my children have always referred to her as their aunt. The fact that they have all found a way to be strong in a world that too often does not respect or protect its young women is a constant source of inspiration. I love all of you and I wish that I could do more for you than a silly post on a silly blog.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
aw, Tony! See, look how happy that just made me!! it was worth the effort! :)
ReplyDeleteMy philosophy for myself: Try not to get too stuck in your own mind. It's better to pop the cork sometimes and bounce your thoughts off of other people, sometimes they'll validate what you've been struggling to accept as legit within yourself, sometimes they'll set you straight and tell you which thoughts are a bunch of hooey. Sometimes they'll irritate you with something that doesn't sit right, but you'll go back to the drawing board with a greater understanding of why you feel the way you do. And sometimes they will just appreciate knowing you better! Well, at least *I* appreciate knowing others better, hopefully it works in reverse also.
I appreciate your post. :)
I miss you guys. I need to come do some more hanging out soon, if it's not too much of a burden. It always seems like everything is so busy but then I look back and I can't remember why I didn't have time.
ReplyDeleteWow. Thanks. When I read your mind, it said something TOTALLY different.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much. I think I have the best brothers in the world, too.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree with Joanne. It is good to pop the cork once in a while. What I like about what we have is that even if we don't agree, we still love each other. I can't read minds, but sometimes I am surprised by how much ours run in sync (which could be bad for either of us, depending on the day!). But even when we don't, I am glad you shared. Nothing in your head could ever make me not love you, not want you a part of my life, or not proud to call you my brother.
Silly Tony! You lured me into that darkened mind years ago and I'm still wandering around looking for the light switch.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm not looking for an exit door. That means something!
Aaron: Yes, you do need to come and hang out with us. Things are busy (for us too), but when you find the time, you are always welcome.
ReplyDeleteLaura: Bwahaha!
Joanne & Sarah: Good thoughts. Amen.